Hello readers welcome to our first episode on single and smart ladies.
In this article we would be discussing about understanding love life
When it comes to an intimate relationship, there is another term concerning which there is somewhat a universal ignorance among many single women, it is love. Love is a term that almost all the women now living use, but without understanding and the right application of it. This ignorance is so dangerous that it has caused a lot of havoc in the world, but most women are not able to trace the cause of these havocs to it.
The majority of single women are ignorant on this subject, it is no surprise therefore that they abuse it.
Ignorance on the subject of love is as old as mankind and many women have accepted it as a part of life. Having a love life is very paramount to having a successful life. No woman is or can be complete without having a love life.
Talking about having a love life and balancing it with the other two aspects of
life; spiritual and career, which makes up the equilateral triangle of a successful life, marriage or whatever the union of a man and a woman coming together to make a family is called, is important, but not compulsory.
Most single women give up after their first or second disappointments in love,
and wouldn’t give it another trial, because they are afraid of getting into such
a messy situation once more. Most of them do not even bother to work on their faults, which may have led to the problems in their love lives. To them, all men are the same.
Some of them take to feminism; fighting for the right of women concerning men because they believe that men are always bad and have the tendency to abuse them. They also use feminism as an alibi to give up on having a love life. Many single career-women do not care about their love lives; they know they need it, but they are unwilling to pay the price demanded to make it work.
They use their career ambitions as alibis to avoid working on their love lives.
To many of them, love life is not as important as a career; they feel they can
settle down anytime they want or may not settle down at all. Negligence of
love life is a mistake most single women make, ignorantly believing that once
success is acquired in career, it will cover-up for it, but this is not, has never
been and will never be the truth.
Unlike failure in career, the failure in love life, more like failure to secure the
right spiritual success is so fatal and is usually passed from one generation
to another. This is why you may hear this statement about some families:
“their women don’t get married.”
A lot of single women take love life with levity because they do not understand
the consequences of such negligence. The question is not that they keep
working on it and keep failing, but that they saw it as something that should
come later, if at all after success has been achieved in their careers or after
they are done with schooling. This is nothing, but a mistake.
I once sated that if a single woman cannot manage an intimate relationship
successfully alongside her schooling, without one obstructing the other, she
is most likely to fail in managing marriage alongside her career. This may be
and often is the reason why we have a lot of failed marriages today.
A woman, who can manage an intimate relationship alongside her studies in
school and still achieve success at both ends, has successfully prepared
herself for a successful life, except only if her spiritual life is faulty. When a
single woman gets to the top of her career, it is harder to achieve success in
love life than it is when she still struggles to get there. Only those who have
been there will be able to tell you this.
If you doubt this statement, ask any single woman you know has had success
in her career, but struggles to have a successful love life, and if she wishes
to tell you the truth, she will tell you it was a mistake to have neglected her
love life for her career.
There is a saying that no man is ever happy and complete without the
modifying influence of the right woman. This is true and truer about women
too. No matter what success a woman has achieved, without the influence of
the right man, she is never completely happy and successful.
Such a woman lives in an inferiority complex whenever she sees people that
are happy with their love lives and have great careers too, she sometimes criticizes them.
She always looks forward to a case of a broken home,
wherein the man is to blame, to support her decision to stay single and not
work on her love life.
The truth is this: man is not created to live alone, and neither is a woman
created to live alone without a man, except for a few exceptions in the case
of eunuchs. It was written in the Bible that “it is not good for a man to be
alone”. The term man, as used in the scripture does not refer to males alone,
it also refers to females. It means that women are not to live alone, while men
are not to live alone too.
As events unfolded subsequently in that chapter of the Bible, there are
enough pieces of evidence that the statement means, but only one thing: a
man should live with a woman and vice versa, not a man with man or woman
with a woman or each of them alone. Read Genesis Chapter 2 verses 18 to 25 in the Bible. Any woman, who decides to stay alone, except in the case of nuns or matters beyond human control, may be sure she is getting something wrong and may cut short of her success in her career.
This is not intended to mean that marriage is a measure of responsibility or
success. Marriage, of all things, is not compulsory, but a love life is, at least
for a stable life that enhances one’s success, except one, is a eunuch. If a
woman does not have a love life, it may be in most cases, a reflection of failure of her spiritual life, the reason of the fact that a part of love is spiritual in nature and negligence of this part is the reason why the majority of women have crippled love life.
The world is getting to that stage where the term marriage, as a part of love life, may most likely be effectively done away from. This is because people have learnt from whichever source they did that having a love life is not important. Because of this faulty belief to which most young women have now
been subjected, we have many women with great careers, but with miserable and unsuccessful lives.
Many women believe that money and fame bring happiness and love, but is not true. The love and happiness that comes with riches and fame go with them, and since fame and riches may not last for life, the majority of people are left to suffer the negligence of their love lives after money and fame are gone.
Another cause of this is a personality disorder known as narcissism, from which almost every person suffers. It is also inspired by similar ideologies as mentioned here.
For a proof that negligence of love life is becoming a common practice, especially among women, and that it could be very fatal, with the consequences passing from one generation to another, make the USA a case study. In the USA, which serves as a model of civilization for the entire world, you will find out that they have more single mothers and that the condition is becoming or has become a celebrated trend there.
One of the reasons why this happens is because the government of such a
country has placed more than necessary power in hands of women, to protect
them from men, most of who were abusive against them or have been in the
Another and the most severe cause is this: from experience most women have learned never to take their love lives seriously. Marriage in such cases is often a matter that is considered of little importance to having a fulfilled life.
This comes with a lot of generational consequences. For instance, a child raised by a single mother is most likely to fancy raising children as a single parent too.
Single parenting can never be compared when both parents are together to raise children, and because most single parents do too much, sometimes out of frustration they abuse the children or paint to them that the other gender is not good enough and that love is wicked. Such is usually registered in the subconscious of these children, who also go on to become single parents, never seeing love life as something to take seriously.
Most of them, due to frustrations, which result from an inability to
get their love lives right take to substance, sex, and alcohol abuse. There is no such reality as a life without love. A life without love is worse than death.
There are only a few feelings in life that are as good as the feeling of knowing that someone that you love loves you in return.
The term “I don’t have a boyfriend/girlfriend” that is commonly used among materially successful people, as proof that they are busy with their careers, is nothing to be proud of at all and they know it. Deep within them, they wish to have someone who cares, someone who loves them like no other, someone that remains when all the paparazzi are all gone.
This is one of the blessings that come with successful love life, but many, not having it, and not willing to work on it makes it look like it is a duty for the unsuccessful one.